Sunday, November 30, 2008

It feels like, more and more, that contentment for the mind is much like strength for the muscles. Some people have it naturally, but most of people have to exercise to have it. It just does not happen by itself.

As physical exercise is to give physical strength to the muscles, meditation is to give contentment to the mind. As without exercise the muscle stays weak, without meditation the mind is unable to find contentment.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

The hardest thing in Buddhism practice is to develop love for all things, all animated and inanimate beings. Not only things but events too. Maybe the difficulty of doing so is the reason why Zen does not focus much on Love. Zen focus on training the mind off distractions, attachments, addictions, delusions, for suffering to unfold as Love in the form of gratitude by itself.

The funny thing to me is that in the end, I must find gratefulness to the same distractions, attachments, addictions and delusions, to the suffering that I am trying to get rid of. It is hard to me to accept that suffering is generated only by the lack of gratitude. Maybe because I am not grateful (?)

Friday, November 28, 2008

Can the whole Universe stay the same when only one sole individual change, seen that every individual is the center and source of the whole Universe?

Thursday, November 20, 2008

It feels sometimes to me that in life there are only two things: suffering and unconditional gratitude. Nothing else. So far, it hasn't mattered how much I have had, or who I have been as a measure of personal fulfillment. All it has mattered is how grateful or ungrateful I have been.

These are very good news. Because I realize that I don't have much control over Life, but I can for sure control how grateful I am to Life.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Tired of suffering

I am tired of suffering, exhausted. The only way I see of not suffering anymore is growing up. The only way for me to grow up, for being an adult already, is to outgrow myself. To outgrow myself as a man, I have to reborn as the Buddha I am, as every being is Buddha.

All I am is a result of my thought and emotions. Thoughts and emotions are always generated from false premises or biased principles. Therefore, what I am as a person is not real. If I am not real, my suffering is not real.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Autumn Leaves

I was sweeping the leaves outside. The ground is still wet. It rainned all day yesterday. There is this one low spot on the pavement where water always accumulates. I have to fix that one day, as everything else that I have to fix in the house, as everything else that I have to fix in my life. I don't even know if Life is fixable. I don't think it is because my life, for example, keeps outgrowing my fixings.

Regardless, all I could do for now was not to break the concrete apart and rebuild the whole thing right, not to break my whole life apart and rebuild the whole thing up, but just sweep most of the leaves on a pile, so it looked less messy. That brought me contentment. Enough contentment to motivate me to wash the dishes in the think. Enough contentment to come running here and write about it to everyone to see it.

Life is like that sometimes for me. I do what I am able to do, regardless of what I am unable to do. And regardless of that, I am able to find some nurturing contentment, and that contentment spreads, better, contagiate other parts of my life. I would like to contagiate other people with this simple contentment too, but that is not up to me. Regadless, I try. That is what I want my writting to be about.

Anyway, I wish, and I hope, one day I'll be able to find happiness in simplicity, that would make things less complicated.